Living Life Intentionally

I must confess that we have had more things get thrown at us from the past these past two weeks then we have had in a long time. Unfortunately, Ray and I struggle the most with our finances and it shows by our past history. I tend to get bogged down in the past and dwell on it (or as my favorite author, Beth Moore, so fondly says. "I'm enjoying my pit").

Several years ago, Ray and I had bought a house in Michigan and had planned on growing old in it. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) for us, Ray's bosses decided that they didn't need several of their employees and laid them off. He happened to be one of the ones that lost their job. Ray spent a whole year trying to find a job and couldn't. Because of these circumstances we lost the house and we moved to Kansas. After we lost the house we thought nothing of it.

Moving forward to today. Ray received a summons to court so that the PMI insurance can collect the money that we "owe" them. To us it doesn't make sense but it is perfectly legal. I went to church today laden with fear, guilt, hurt, and why's. I kept thinking about the past. How our choices in the past have effected us, how we were not being the best stewards of God's resources, and how we can't be effective witness because of this burden from our past.

Do you know that God meets us even when we don't understand? He gives us answers even when we may not want to hear? He is still God even when we forget that? I walked into that meeting tonight thinking that I was not worthy of being a child of God and He walked in and told me to not look at the past but look at the future. God calls us to intentionally "Forget what is behind and strain towards what is ahead, toward the goal". This is part of Philippians 3:12-14 and God, through the Apostle Paul, is telling us the importance of focusing on the goal that He has for us and not on our failures of the past. When we are focused on God's goal then we will intentionally live our lives to pursue that goal. We will make wise choices and we will also trust in Him to take us through the struggles that we are in today. Even the struggles that we have put ourselves in.

One more scripture that goes along with looking into the future. 2 Corinthians 5:17-19 says, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!..." If God sees us as a new creation, that means He is not looking back at our mistakes and sins. He is looking forward to the promise that He has given us in each of our lives. We may not see that promise right now but it is there and He will be faithful to bring it to pass. I am excited that even if I forget and look back, God never looks back and condemns me.

I may not know what the world is holding out for the future of my family, but I can count on the fact that God has a glorious future in store for us. Remember John 11:40? Jesus said, "Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?" Well, I have to believe that God is greater than this problem because I want to see the glory of God. Will the outcome be hard for us to bear? I don't know, but I know that somehow God will receive glory.